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Update: Aug 29, 2010 @ 18:25 GMT Teenager Decides To Pass Police Cruiser At 100 MPH. Watch A Firebird Fly Into Oblivion. Amazingly, He Lived 2 min 14 sec video This is
about what this boy's 1985 black Pontiac Firebird muscle car looked
like before he thought it would be cool to overtake a police cruiser at
100 MPH:
This
is what this boy's 1985 black Pontiac Firebird muscle car looked like
after he thought it would be cool to overtake a police cruiser at 100
MPH:
This is how this boy's 1985 black Pontiac Firebird muscle car went from
one state to the other. This happened in Green County, Ohio,
around August 25, 2010. At this moment the driver, 19-year-old Brennan S.
Eden from Mason, Ohio, is in the hospital in critical
condition.
Update: Aug 29, 2010 @ 16:55 GMT Medical Disorder: 2 Docs Deliver Punches Over Whether To Do A Cesarean. Mother & Child Neglected. Go Critical Police considering criminal charges A mother,
Laura Salpietro of Sicily, and her child, are in critical
condition because urgent attention to her delivery gone wrong was
delayed by an hour when gynecologist, Vincenzo Benedetto,
and maternity unit doctor, Antonio De Vivo, got into a violent
fight over whether to deliver the baby by Cesarean; Delivering punches
instead of the baby. Furious Health Minister Ferruccio Fazio said:''This is a very serious matter. Exchanging blows with anyone is unforgivable but especially so when you are a doctor.'' A criminal case has been opened. The Daily Mail (UK) 29-Aug-10 Click here for the original story Update: Aug 29, 2010 @ 02:02 GMT Army Vet Who Lost A Leg In Afghanistan Is Denied A Disabled Parking Sticker Because 'He Might Get Better' Lance
Corporal Johno Lee, who lost his leg fighting in Afghanistan, has been
thrice denied a disabled parking sticker because the local
Nottinghamshire UK County Council believes he might get better. Wait.
What? He has, so far, racked up £800 ($1,240) in fines for parking in a handicapped space on days he uses a wheelchair or has difficulty walking. When he first applied for the sticker he was advised that he's young and 'may get better.' The Daily Mail (UK) 27-Aug-10 Click here for the original story
Update: Aug 29, 2010 @ 00:00 GMT If You Can't Go Under Or Around A Car To Pass It, Why Not Go Over It? Amazing luck? Or amazing skill? Driver surely gets a passing grade in the driving course Update: Aug 28, 2010 @ 22:04 GMT In The
Nudes Today, My Interest Rates Are Rising
Update: Aug 28, 2010 @ 20:36 GMT BA
Flight Accidentally Announces Plane Will Crash. Hilarity Ensues About 275 passengers
flying to Hong Kong from London were struck with terror when a computer
voice calmly announced, "This
is an emergency. We may shortly need to make an emergency landing on
water." The water, in this case, being the North Sea. Said one passenger, "I can't think of anything worse than being told your plane's about to crash." BA is blaming the computer, of course. There's a Microsoft joke in here somewhere. The Daily Mail (UK) 27-Aug-2010 Click here for original story Update: Aug 25, 2010 @ 20:36 GMT Do You
Blog In Philadelphia? Did You Pay Your $50/year Blogger Tax? Blog this
(while it's still free). A bit of an update: Update: Aug 25, 2010 @ 20:36 GMT A Few
"Unclear On The Concept" Bonehead Awards
Update: Aug 25, 2010 @ 18:36 GMT So,
How's That Anti-Vaccination Thing Working Out For You? Eight people, 7 of them infants, have
now died from Whooping Cough (Pertussis) in a California outbreak. A
disease everyone thought would never be seen again in the US. All
because some people believe vaccinations are, ironically, harmful.
Reminds me of a t-shirt, "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups." Update: Aug 22, 2010 @ 16:10 GMT Today's
Tip: Calling Yourself A "Sovereign Citizen" Doesn't Allow You To Take
Someone's House A woman calling herself
"Princess Donya Taylor" (Princess of fools) and her husband, Ivan
Willis Taylor, face charges for stealing a number of houses in the
Atlanta, Georgia, area under the claim that they are "sovereign
citizens," immune from Georgia laws, for some reason or other. Update: Aug 22, 2010 @ 15:22 GMT Trio Who
Robbed Home Returns To Get Remaining Stuff While Police Are Processing
The Scene A trio of men who apparently
will stop at nothing to get what they want, returned to the home they
had earlier burgled so they could get more stuff, even though
police were inside processing the crime scene. Northwest Florida Daily News 20-Aug-2010 Click here for original story Update: Aug 21, 2010 @ 18:47 GMT Translates
Into Being Too Lazy To Ask A Fluent Speaker To Check The Signs As a person who only speaks one
language (well, a little French), I don't think it's right to
make fun of English translation mistakes. However there's no excuse for
a government agency or a business owner, to create signs without having
a fluent English speaker check them first. Heck, a blog
posting is all that would be needed. So we laugh at the expense of the lazy people who don't want to do their jobs well. Enjoy!
Update: Aug 19, 2010 @ 23:43 GMT Man Who Robbed A Walgreens Pharmacy Came Back Three Days Later To Pick Up His Prescription, Police Said He could have saved himself a lot of trouble if he did both in one trip. What difference? If only there was a pharmacy to
rob that had many different store locations in the area. Douglas F. Manning of Springfield, Missouri, wearing a tan jacket and arriving in a silver four-door passenger car, robbed a Walgreens pharmacy clerk at gunpoint. He returned a few days later, wearing a tan jacket and arriving in a the same silver four-door passenger car, to pick up a prescription ... from the same clerk.
News-Leader (Springfield, Missouri) 19-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 19, 2010 @ 01:07 GMT Man Shined Laser At Police Helicopter To See If The Police Would Come, Police Said Not the brightest laser in the box A San Diego,
California man, Payam Daniel Keshmiri, is being held on $25,000 bail
after being arrested for shining a laser at a police helicopter.
"...they told
their friend [Keshmiri] not to shine the light at the helicopter, but
he did anyway because he wanted to see if the police would come..." Death, taxes and the police responding to a laser assault all go together, dude. San Diego Union-Tribune (San Diego, California) 18-Aug-01 Click here for original story Update: Aug 18, 2010 @ 21:00 GMT If You Google "This document is CONFIDENTIAL," You Get Over 397,000 Hits. Mostly From Those Who Own Them. You're doing it all wrong Wikileaks
has gotten a lot of press lately for exposing documents that are
supposedly to be kept confidential. Introducing ordinary Google When everything is claimed to be "confidential," either to protect from future undefined legal scenarios, because information is power and someone is being piggish or because of laziness, people are trained not to pay attention nor care because something claiming to be confidential is likely not to be very confidential. I saw a posting on Reddit.com showing the number of Google hits you get searching for the exact phrase "This document is CONFIDENTIAL" and had a look. I was surprised how many hits there are and how many of the authorized information holders are the ones exposing their own supposedly confidential documents via the Internet. There's something pretty boneheaded here.. Here is the second page from my Google search showing over 397,000 hits:
Update: Aug 17, 2010 @ 17:35 GMT Who
Can't Not Resist? Not quite your standard restaurant twofer deal ... I think.
Update: Aug 17, 2010 @ 13:52 GMT Best Not To Get The Boss Involved In Ball Playing Classic schlemiel and schlimazel. A 23 sec video Yiddish has
the concept of a schlemiel and a schlimazel. Sadly, English does
not. A schlemiel is always the one who causes problems, but
never on purpose. He accidentally spills the soup. A schlimazel is the
person who always seems to be the unlucky one. The one who always gets
the souped spilled on him. Don't try to get your boss involved in playing ball with you if he's a schlemiel. Well,
It's Not Exactly How I Would Have Said It. But The Point Is Made
Update: Aug 16, 2010 @ 17:30 GMT For
A Great YouTube Opportunity, Ask Prof Rosenthal If She Wants
Butter On Her Bagel "Linguistically, it's stupid,
and I'm a stickler for correct English," is the excuse given
by NYC English professor, Lynne Rosenthal, for her having become
"enraged" after being asked if she wanted her bagel "without
butter or cheese." She was so upset and so enraged by the question that
police had to intervene and threaten her arrest if she did not leave
the Starbucks cafe willingly. Perceived linguistic purity trumps social grace "I just wanted a multigrain bagel," Rosenthal told The Post. "I refused to say 'without butter or cheese.' " "It was very humiliating to be thrown out, and all I did was ask for a bagel," Rosenthall added. Um no, professor. Asking for a bagel is not all you did, is not what caused the humiliation nor is it what caused your being tossed. Let's be linguistically proper by not selectively excluding important information. And is calling the employee an "a.. hole," linguistically proper, I wonder? And I purposely spelled your name wrong the last time I wrote it. The New York Post (New York City) 16-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 15, 2010 @ 07:06 GMT Signs Of
Unintelligent Life
In our
continuing search for signs of unintelligent life in the
Universe, we've come across these two:
Update: Aug 15, 2010 @ 01:54 GMT Not a BH
award. Prove You've Got What It Takes Mentally! Take The Swedish Armed
Forces Leadership Test Ready to prove you have what it
takes mentally for leadership and teamwork? The Swedish Armed Forces
have put one of their mental leadership and teamwork tests on the web. You affect the
outcome of your team members and they affect yours. There are 3 other anonymous people assigned to your team. Depending on how well you and your team do, the test can run a minute to maybe 5 minutes? Have your headphones on when you start and, for your team member's sake, don't start it if you are going to be distracted. You are timed and can end it all quickly for your team if you lose your concentration. I found it interesting and fun. My last team was a good team. Tell me what you think of the test. Click here to start the Swedish Armed Forces test and good luck! Update: Aug 11, 2010 @ 23:36 GMT They Turned Her Into A Butt Head! Some losers just can't get it together when handling a sexy woman
Update: Aug 9, 2010 @ 20:04 GMT If You Don't Plan Your Van Designs Properly, You Could Be Opening The Door To A Misunderstanding A business delivering personal service and a radio station playing the latest sh*t. Still Works, sort of.
Update: Aug 9, 2010 @ 16:32 GMT Man
Blames Dyslexia For 103 MPH Driving. Judge Also Not Amused By
His "Gesticulating"
While Driving Matthew Cook
of the UK was arrested for driving at 103MPH whilst gesticulating. He tried blaming it
on his dyslexia (the speeding, not the gesticulating) claiming, I
guess, that he thought he was driving at 30 MPH? or maybe 10? The judge
didn't buy it and he's now banned from driving for 5 years. But he can continue gesticulating, preferably in private. The Telegraph (UK) 09-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 9, 2010 @ 02:17 GMT Man Dies At The World Sauna Competition After 6 Minutes In A 230F Oven. Strange. Turkeys Usually Go Into 325F Ovens Sad that he basted away his life like this Two men,
Vladimir Ladyzhensky of Russia, and Timo Kaukonen of Finland, were both
determined to outlast the other at the "World Sauna Competition," held
in Heinola, Finland. They roasted in a 230F (110C) oven for 6 minutes. The
competition ended when Ladyzhensky died and Kaukonen collapsed and
needed to be rushed to the hospital. Water boils at 212F at sea level (100C). 230F well exceeds the point at which flesh burns and blood boils. The dumb thing about this competition is that there is a physics enforced limit to the world record possibility. Attempting to exceed this limit results in death or severe injury. One witness said both were badly burned when removed from the sauna. Kaukonen, we suppose, is the winner? He must feel very proud of himself? Reminds me of the song, "The Winner," by Bobby Bare (below). The Telegraph (UK) 07-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 8, 2010 @ 15:00 GMT Man
Cited For Owning Chickens Because Someone Said He Owned Chickens, Lazy
Code Enforcer Said Robert
Sosbee of Austell, Georgia, came home to find a citation
taped
to his door citing him for owning livestock.
Apparently, someone
mistook a ceramic chicken for a real chicken and called it into code
enforcement. That's boneheaded too. 
And why was he issued a citation for a ceramic chicken? "He [code
enforcer] was told that there were real chickens in the backyard."
You'd think that if the guy went all the way down to Sosbee's house to
deliver a citation that he would at least look for himself before
issuing the citation? WSBTV, channel 2 (Atlanta, Georgia) 20-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 6, 2010 @ 15:00 GMT Pro Tip: When On Camera, Only Scratch The Thought Of Doing It. Scratch Nothing More 25 second video
Update: Aug 5, 2010 @ 21:07 GMT Not a Bonehead Award.
One Of The Greatest Catches In Baseball History By Japanese Player
Masato 'Spiderman' Akamatsu Update: Aug 5, 2010 @ 04:04 GMT Driver Gets A Crash Course In Understanding "Do Not Enter" 12 second video. Driver not so smart as he thought Update: Aug 5, 2010 @ 04:04 GMT Lucky For Escaping A Certain Death Twice? Or Unlucky For Being So Dumb? Bet you watch this 30 second video twice Attempted Murder & Armed Robbery Fugitive Attended The Local Law Enforcement Meet And Greet, Police Said 'In plain sight' is not always the best hiding place Former
fugitive, Joseph S. Cromer,
wanted for attempted murder and armed robbery, was arrested in
Greenville, South Carolina, when spotted at the Night
Out Against Crime event. An event heavily attended by both
locals, law enforcement personnel and, apparently, fugitives. WYFF Channel 4 (Greenville, South Carolina) 3-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 4, 2010 @ 13:54 GMT FBI Threatens Action Against Wikipedia Over Imaginary Law "...we must work with the actual language of the statute, not the aspirational version." For the rest
of us, "ignorance of the law is no excuse." But if you're the FBI, you
simply rewrite the law. Or so the agency apparently believes. Deciding that there ought to be a law against Wikipedia presenting a high resolution image of the FBI seal, the bureau wrote a threatening letter to Wikimedia, the parent of Wikipedia, demanding that the high resolution images of the seal be removed as they claim it violates US code 18,701. The bureau then cited the law, but with the words central to the purpose of the law, removed. Wikimedia refuses to remove the images and states in their letter to the bureau, which also identifies the omissions, "While we appreciate your desire to revise the statute to reflect your expansive vision of it, the fact is that we must work with the actual language of the statute, not the aspirational version." What do you think? Feel free to leave a comment below. The New York Times 2-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 4, 2010 @ 00:53 GMT Australian Judge Rules That Drunk Driving In Some Towns Is OK A "justice is blind, but only because it has its head up its butt, bonehead award" An
Australian magistrate, Brian "Baloney" Maloney, ruled yesterday that
drunk driving is permissible in many Australian Towns. Although,
presumably not the one he lives in. Jasmin Clair Henley, arrested by police for DUI, was let go without conviction when she told Baloney she had to drive drunk because there was no bus to take her home. On this basis, and this basis alone, charges were dismissed. Yes, there are taxis. Yes, she could have drank less. Yes, she could have arranged for someone to drive her. Yes, she could have killed someone. None of this was relevant. It's not her fault. You can bet your life that it's your fault. You don't provide enough buses for people who drink too much. Daily Telegraph (Sydney, Australia) 4-Aug-10 Click here for original story Update: Aug 1, 2010 @ 21:58 GMT Oddly, It's Very Uncool Car air conditioning designs from men without girlfriends
Update: July 31, 2010 @ 17:03 GMT Health & Safety Bans Kiddie Pools As Being Fire Hazards Despite Fire Dept. Reminder That Water Is Nice At A Fire Because a fire engine may get stuck in a kiddie pool. I'm not making this up With an apparent lack of understanding of how things work in the physical world, and with complete disregard to the appeals from the local fire department, health and safety at a housing association which runs council housing for London borough, Havering, have decided to ban kids paddling pools because fire trucks might not be able to drive over them. Really.
What do you think?
Daily Mail (UK) 31-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 30, 2010 @ 23:13 GMT
Update: July 27, 2010 @ 21:00 GMT Woman Discovers Her Husband Has A 2nd Wife. Frack. He Posted The Wedding Pictures On Facebook! And He Also ... Someone could write a book about the changing face of the world thanks to the Internet Pro
tip one: If you're going to have a second wife, resist the urge to
literally spread the information around the globe via Facebook. Pro tip two: If you tell one of your wives that you are in China for a long term business trip, don't leave your passport at home. A bit surprising this guy even knows how to log into Facebook, actually. "The pictures are out there for the world to see," says Megan, wife one in Cleveland, Ohio. "It's not just that I have the knowledge, but I see the proof and everyone I know sees the proof and people I don't know see the proof." Which includes you now, dear reader. WKYC TV (Cleveland/Akron, Ohio) 28-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 27, 2010 @ 12:55 GMT Unfortunate Eye Hand Coordination. My Eye, His Hand 40 second video Update: July 27, 2010 @ 00:37 GMT Parents.com Uses An Explicit Photo Of A Nude Young Girl. You're Doing It All Wrong It's not their fault. It's the photographer's fault. In other news, Parents.com hires photographers who like taking pictures of nude young girls. Parents.com, part of Parenting magazine, is apologizing for the "unquestionably inappropriate photo" which
appeared in their newsletter to parents which displays a nude little
girl playing inside a suitcase "with her genitals clearly exposed."
They blame it on their photographer who forgot to use only the
top half of the photo for the newsletter. You can see the video of the Fox news report from the link below where the reporter presents the story with the impartiality you'd expect from the major shareholder of parents.com. Fox news apparently didn't find anything unusual about a photographer working for a parenting magazine who likes to take explicit photos of the genitalia of nude little girls who are implicitly transported inside of a suitcase. Nor did they think to ask why parents.com uses photographers who do. Just saying, is all. Fox News (Boston, Massachusetts) 27-Jun-10 Click here for original story Update: July 28, 2010 @ 21:33 GMT Man Says Police Illegally Forced 19 Felony Confessions By Withholding A Bag Of Chips And A Soda Because police know he'll do anything for a bag of chips and a soda. A "stupidest excuse in the world," bonehead award Bruce Tuck,
a 275 pound Tennessee serial rapist, says he confessed to 19
felony charges because police traded him the confessions for a bag of
chips and a soda. He also says his confessions are invalid because
police failed to read him his "Miranda right." [sic] And every
other excuse he could think of. Tuck's public defender says he does not know what Tuck ate in jail. WMC TV (Channel 5) Memphis, Tennessee 20-Jun-10 Click here for original story Update: July 26, 2010 @ 00:17 GMT NYC Cop Helps Woman Fix Her Flat Tire. Joking. He Ticketed Her For "Illegal Parking" And Then Left Would Chu like to meet NYC's worst NYPD member? NYC Traffic Cop, Daniel Chu "baka," ticketed a woman for
illegal parking while she was changing a flat tire in a dirt area off
road. "I said to him, 'Are you kidding me?, " recounts Tammy Fox, of New Rochelle, NY, " ... I'm trying to fix my
flat tire , and you're standing here writing me a ticket?" But wait, there's more ... This is the same cop who turned on his flashing lights and drove high speed through city streets, running red lights and stop signs, while talking on a cell phone, to get coffee at a Dunkin' Donuts. And the same cop who screamed profanities at a parked funeral procession and then ticketed every car. New York City, why would chu want to keep him? Update: July 23, 2010 @ 16:22 GMT Ooh. Giant Animal. Let's Throw Something At It 45 second video Update: July 23, 2010 @ 16:22 GMT Ann Arbor, Millions In The Red, Can't Afford An $850K Art Piece. Just Joking. They're Laying Off Fire Fighters To Pay For It No matter how you view it, it ain't pretty Flaming
insane is how you might describe the decision by Ann Arbor, Michigan,
to buy an $850K water sculpture with one hand while writing layoff
notices to city fire fighters with the other. "I think it is incredibly insensitive," Ann Arbor City Councilor Kunselman said. "It is insensitive to the staff and their morale. It is insensitive to the community. There are people out there struggling financially, and here we are spending a large amount of money on a piece of art." The city claims the money is coming from two different accounts but the city has the ability to move funds between accounts and has done so when it suited personal political agendas in the past. Michigan Capitol Confidential 22-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 23, 2010 @ 01:55 GMT Apparently This Does Need To Be Said. Tear Gas Training Should Never Be Done Next To A Group Of Day Care Campers It can only end in tears For reasons
that you nor I will ever understand, the New York state
Department of Correctional Services thought tear gas training next to a
facility used by Day Care campers for outdoor activities was just the
perfect place. What can possibly go wrong? Seven people had to be treated for burning eyes and burning mouths from tear gas exposure. About 60 people had to run for shelter when the training began. Times Union (Albany, NY) 23-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 22, 2010 @ 22:42 GMT When The Internet Naive Pick Your Domain Name Presenting 5 mighty unfortunate Internet domain names
Also there are stories going about the Internet listing other domains but these either no longer exist or were apparently set up on purpose to attract attention. Update: July 22, 2010 @ 13:34 GMT A Sign That The Marketing People Have Too Much Sway It's never a good idea to mix marketing and honesty
Update: July 21, 2010 @ 13:38 GMT 2 Prisoners Escape From Jail While The Soccer Ball Watched And Did Nothing. Wait, What? "Prison security is over inflated" says the soccer ball on a stick wearing a guard hat. Well, it would if it could talk.
Two prisoners escaped from an Argentinian jail while being watched by a
soccer ball attached to a stick and wearing a guard hat. Meet Wilson.
And the video surveillance cameras stopped working months ago so they
are fake too. There isn't enough money to get real people to guard the prisoners so officials tried using a prop that looks like a guard. Those applying for prison guard positions are advised not to bring a long face to the interview. BBC (UK) 20-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 20, 2010 @ 15:00 GMT Add "Are You Serving Any Meals?" To The List Of Things, Like, "High Jack," That You Should Never Utter At The Airport Man's butt hauled off the plane by police after his asking A first class passenger who boarded a
United Airlines flight asked the flight attendant the dark question,
"Are you serving any meals during our flight?" A few minutes later two
armed Austin, Texas, police officers hauled him from the flight. The flight attendant somehow parsed his question into him asking if there were any police on board? Instead of asking him to repeat the question she ran for the police. Our best advice to those of you planning on taking a flight ... just shut up and enjoy the flight. The Consumerist 20-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 20, 2010 @ 15:00 GMT A Legally Parked Car Is Lifted, 'No Parking' Lines Painted Under It, Placed Back In Wrong Direction And Then Ticketed. Ta Da! UK thinks they found a 'fine' way to raise extra cash Sally
Baker's legally parked Peugeot became her illegally parked Peugeot when
she returned to it later in the day. Manchester city centre council
workers in the UK, whilst she was away, lifted her car (and two other
people's cars), painted double yellow lines underneath it (indicating a
no parking zone), placed it back in the wrong direction and then
ticketed the car for illegal parking. The ticket was removed when protested. One city official said this is done on purpose to protect the drivers from a second ticket because, unlike the rest of the UK, Manchester has this awesome great magic computer to automatically deal with this. Right. Another city official says it won't happen again. The Daily Mail (UK) 20-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 19, 2010 @ 17:02 GMT A NOT A Bonehead Award. Balloon bass and a box. I think this is awesome. Do you agree? Let me know. Update: July 18, 2010 @ 23:31 GMT If You Ask US Airways For A Military Discount They Might Charge You $200 More Just their way of giving special recognition to those who put their lives on the line for them A
North Carolina couple, excited that their Army son and their grandson
were flying in from Texas for a visit, called US Airways to arrange for
the tickets. They were shocked when the ticket price rose $200
after requesting the military discount. Then it gets stranger The airline apparently refused to remove the "discount." The couple had to cancel the tickets and buy them online to get the civilian price. Um, US Air, would you mind thinking about changing the first part of your name, please? The Fayetteville Observer (Fayetteville, North Carolina) 18-Jul-10 Click here for original story Update: July 18, 2010 @ 14:08GMT
Update: July 16, 2010 @ 23:24 GMT Police
Wrestle/Handcuff Woman During Epileptic Seizure. Charge Her W/ Assault
and Cocaine Use. Co-workers Told Them She Had Epilepsy. Jessica
Yochum of Mt. Lebanon, Pennsylvania, is suing the Mt.
Lebanon police
for their actions after they responded to a call to assist her during
one of her epileptic seizures, and ignorantly decided instead that she
was having a drug overdose. She was handcuffed, shackled and
restrained during the seizure, the opposite of how a to
handle a
seizure, and then they charged her with aggravated assault and illegal
drug use. She was left with large bruises and cuts following the
incident. Co-workers tried telling police she was seizing but police
wanted to believe otherwise. Update: July 13, 2010 @ 02:26 GMT Finally, Someone Gets
Serious About Lowering Govt Costs. Vienna Is Fed-up W/
People Drinking Pool Water and Costing City
$1.67/day The
city of Vienna has calculated that they lose $1.67 per day by having to
constantly add water and chlorine to a city pool and they are
convinced this is because people are drinking the pool. What else can
it be? Update: July 12, 2010 @ 02:03 GMT Man Tossed From Nightclub
Rams His Van Into The Club, Beats Up His Sister, Vowing To Cut Off Her
Head, Is Free On $2,800 Bond. Wait, What?
Update: July 11, 2010 @ 16:01 GMT Bloomberg News Banner Racially Bombs Oxford University Economist A new chink in Bloomberg's reputation
Update: July 11, 2010 @ 01:37 GMT Apparently, You Are More Than Qualified To Be A Special Effects "Pro" At Fox News. Really. The most ridiculous animal animation ever. Watch the animals move and talk. But the poop is real. Silly story too. 1.5 min video Update: July 10, 2010 @ 01:41 GMT If You Want To Take Great Sexy Pictures, You Need To Have The Right Background For It Two sexy picture fails
Update: July 8 2010 @ 02:22 GMT JCPenny Donates Unsold Clothes To Charity. Just Kidding. They Cut It Up With Knives And Trash It It keeps their profits up. There, now, don't you feel better about it?
Update: July 4, 2010 @ 18:27 GMT The Children Always Look Excited When Sitting On The New Playground Toy! Playground equipment design failure What were they thinking when
they came up with this thing? Actually, never mind. I don't want to
know.
Update: July 3, 2010 @ 20:35 GMT When Storing Your Loaded Gun In The Stove, Best To Resist The Urge To Investigate Popping Sounds Heard During Cooking Loaded Smith and Wesson becomes the chef's surprise Antoine Boutte of
College Park, Georgia, has a problem using
stoves. His ideas are half-baked and he creates recipes for destruction.
Antoine thought that keeping his loaded .40 caliber Smith and Wesson at the bottom of his stove was a cool place for it. When he and his friend began hearing popping sounds while cooking, his friend opened the stove door to investigate. The hospital says he'll live. Atlanta-Journal-Constitution (Atlanta, Georgia) 3-Jul-2010 Click here for the original story Update: July 2, 2010 @ 15:44 GMT Need Holes In The Wall To Install Satellite TV? Why Not Use A Gun Instead Of A Drill? Call it a "Black and Deck Her" drill Why mess around with a pesky
drill to make holes in your bedroom wall
for installing your satellite TV system when you can blast them out
with your gun? It's an interesting question. And the answer depends on
which side of the wall you're on when considering the issue.
Ronald Long of Deepwater, Missouri, shot and killed his wife, Patsy, while using his new "Black and Deck Her" drill to make two holes for his satellite TV installation. He didn't think she was outside, if he does any thinking at all. KCTV (Kansas, Missouri) 25-Mar-08 Click here for the original story Update: July 2, 2010 @ 22:35 GMT Dell Says Multiple Computer Failures Due To Difficult Math Problems University of Texas Math Dept Sues. Says It Doesn't Add Up Today, a "Stupidest Excuse In
The World, Bonehead Award,"
goes to Dell Inc.
The University of Texas Math Department is suing Dell over a number of computer failures after Dell offered up the explanation that "the school had overtaxed the machines by making them perform difficult math calculations." Sometimes it takes a lawyer to fix a computer. The New York Times 28-Jun-10 Click here for the original story Update: June 30, 2010 @ 00:35 GMT One For The Police Blog A 32 second video.
Update: Aug 17, 2009 @ 01:34 GMT UK School System Requires All Teenagers Get Certification In Knowing How To Catch A Bus So students who can't get certified in anything else won't feel bad Students in Greater Manchester,
UK, will need to achieve certification
in , "Using Public Transport (Unit 1)" which recognizes a teenager's
ability to catch a public bus. Specifically,
It has to be extremely embarrassing though for students who don't get qualified. Says one teenager, “At first I thought I’d got some sort of GCSE early. But when I read out the details to the family we all fell about laughing. " Now that they've been globally ridiculed, the Authority says they somehow suddenly came to realize that they used all the wrong words for the certification requirements. We award them certification in "Using Back Peddling (Unit 1)." In other news, the lowest possible point in "dummying down" has been discovered in the UK. The Telegraph (UK) 13-Aug-09 Click here for the original story Man Who Stole iPods From Work Posted Ads At The Store He Stole Them From, Police Said Dumb AdSS! A Great Falls, Montana, man,
Remo Spencer, who stole several
iPods and computers from the Wal-Mart store he worked
at, posted them for sale on the store's employee bulletin
board, according to police and the store security cameras.
The Billings Gazette (Billings, Montana) 22-Apr-09 Click here for the original story Red Cross Workers Tell Injured Bleeding Runner They Aren't Allowed To Use Adhesive Bandages And Antiseptic Because It's Too Dangerous Said they would have to remove their uniforms to comply. Wait. What? An "unclear on the concept," bonehead award goes to two Red Cross workers in Yorkshire Dales, UK, who told an injured and bleeding runner that they were not allowed to provide Band-Aids (plasters) and antiseptic because of the allergic reaction potential. Obviously better to risk infection. "I couldn't believe it. I was bleeding quite heavily at the time," said Mr. Dickinson, the injured runner. "One of them said he could give me a plaster if he took his uniform off, but the other said he better not." A refreshment stand employee tended to his injuries instead. What possible reason did the Red Cross pair think they were sent there for, with medical kit in hand, if not to provide first aid to injured people using these very same items in the medical kit? And what says the Red Cross? The volunteers are provided with kits containing these items for such incidents and apparently the pair is not clear on the Red Cross policy. You think? Sounds like a mental health volunteer may need to be included along with the Red Cross first aid volunteers at events. The Telegraph (UK) 26-Jul-09 Click here for the original story Could Anyone Be Stupid Enough To Believe That The Hotel Wants Them To Break The Room Window With The Toilet Tank? Yes. And they also broke through the wall believing they had to rescue the guy in the next room. But alas, there is no rescue from stupidity. Would you believe that anyone
could be stupid enough to believe a
caller, claiming to be a hotel staff member, who says that smashing the
window with the toilet tank is the only way to avoid death from a gas
leak? And who says you must smash the mirror
and break a hole in the wall because the man next door needs
to be rescued?
If not, please meet Mark and Lisa Kantoriski who did some $10,000 damage to their Hilton Garden Inn room in Orlando Florida, after following the caller's instructions. What were they thinking? "When I broke the window, I got suspicious. It didn't seem right, but she (Lisa) was panicking, so I continued." There. That's what they were thinking.. The police said the couple cannot be arrested because the two believed they were responding to an emergency. Or to put it another way, there's no law against stupidity. This is but the latest in a string of damage instigated by prank callers in the US. We reported a case of some $50,000 damage done by a hotel clerk who was told that completely destroying the lobby and breaking the sprinkler head was the only way to keep the sprinkler system from activating. See it here. The article cites other cases, like the Arkansas motel employee who did $50K damage to "test" the emergency alarms. NEWS.co.au (Australia) 9-Jul-09 Click here for the original story Update: July 6, 2009 @ 23:54 GMT "I'm Too Tared To Cross The
Street." Watch Lazy People Stuck Like Flies While
Trying To Get Around Those Pesky Tar Spreaders Blocking The Crosswalk Why do people, seeing a number of large trucks spreading tar on the road, never-the-less decide that there would be no problem running across the road? So we can watch them on the Internet! A 1:15 video. UK Refuses To Release
Names Of 39 Escaped Prisoners, Citing Privacy Protection. Releasing
Victim's Names Still OK You
whipped out your "Freedom of Information Act" but I completely
blocked it with the power of my "Data Protection Acts!" Suck it UK citizens.
The UK Ministry of Justice is refusing to provide the names of 39 escaped prisoners from the Hollesley Bay open prison, saying that doing so would breach UK data protection laws, despite a request under the Freedom of Information Act. "It is the general policy of the Ministry of Justice not to disclose, to a third party, personal information about another person." Do you remember when we worried about being the victim of a lack of privacy? BBC 3-Jul-09 Click here for original story Update: July 4, 2009 @ 14:54 GMT UK Schools Ban Parents
From Attending Athletic Events Because A Parent Could Be A Pedophile
"If we let
parents into the school they would have been free to roam the grounds" said Paul Blunt of the East
Bedfordshire School Sports Partnership. "The ultimate fear is that a
child is hurt or abducted, and we must take all measures possible to
prevent that." Update: June 12, 2009 @ 02:21 GMT Caller Tells Hotel Clerk
She Has To Smash All Lobby Windows & Snap Sprinkler Head. Clerk
Replies, "I'm Not That Stupid!" Only Kidding.
$50,000 In Damages Ensue Who could possibly be stupid
enough to obey, without a thought, an
anonymous caller who gives orders to immediately turn on the hotel fire
alarm, smash all the lobby windows, break off a sprinkler head and shut
off the electricity, to prevent the sprinkler system from turning on?
Why, Conway, Arkansas, Holiday Inn Express front desk clerk,
Christina Bergmann, and hotel guest, Rusty Brown, that's who!
The caller had tried this
earlier with a Little Rock Arkansas, Holiday Inn Express, where, of
course, nobody was stupid enough to fall for it.
The police report contains all the details. Click the link below. Conway Arkansas Police Report
6-Jun-09
Update: June 6, 2009 @ 20:01 GMT Woman Sues Quaker Oats
Because She Thought A Captain Crunch Crunchberry Was A Real Berry And
She Learned It Isn't Janine Sugawara of California
was shocked to learn that the
"crunchberries" in Captain Crunch Crunchberries cereal are not
real berries. She had been eating them for better health for four
years.  Whilst most people would be too
embarrassed to tell anyone
they had believed such a stupid thing, Sugawara went
and filed a class action lawsuit against Quaker Oats, claiming that
they purposely deceived "reasonable" people into believing that
crunchberries were a real fruit. Can you have a "class" of
one?
While we are all fed up by the number of stupid lawsuits which are allowed to progress, and which often end with ridiculous awards, our hero, US District Judge, Morrison C. England, Jr., immediately dismissed the suit writing, "Under normal circumstances, when
this Court grants a Motion to Dismiss, the Plaintiff is given a
reasonable period of time, usually twenty (20) days, in which to file
an amended complaint. In this case, however, it is simply impossible
for Plaintiff to file an amended complaint stating a claim based upon
these facts. The survival of the instant claim would require this Court
to ignore all concepts of personal responsibility and common sense.The Court has no intention of
allowing that to happen."
The specific reasons for the dismissal include:
Update: June 1, 2009 @
23:03 GMT Genetically Modified
What? Don't Ask Me. I'll Let The World's Worst Speaker Describe It To
You The world's worst speaker
discusses modern genetics. 17
second video. Not safe for work without headphones.
Update: May 31, 2009 @
18:39 GMT Ask A Baltimore Police
Officer For Directions? You Better Believe Your Butt
Is Going To Be Hauled In A
young couple, Joshua Kelly and Llara Brook, of Chantilly, Virginia,
found themselves lost while driving in Baltimore, Maryland.
They were relieved, of course, when they spotted a police cruiser.
When "officer" Preston spotted them asking another officer for directions she decided to bite. She stepped between the couple and the other officer snarling, "My partner is not going to step in front of me and tell you directions if I'm not." Then she fetched their butts to the station where they remained locked up for "trespassing." "It was a nightmare," said Brook. "In jail for 8 hours. Sleeping on a concrete floor next to a toilet." Wrong one, wrong type of pound Kelly's car was sent to the police car pound where the police left it both unlocked and with the windows down. Stuff, of course, was stolen from the car. Brook's parents are both Pennsylvania police officers. We'll follow this story and report updates. Article has video interview with victims. WBAL TV (Baltimore, MD) 17-May-09 Click here to see original story Update: May 31, 2009 @
01:40 GMT Russian Warship
Mistakenly Deploys A Full Attack Salvo On A Small Village.
Frack: The Only Damage Was A Broken Car Window A Russian warship, during naval
training, accidentally executed an attack
salvo against a small Russian Village. The attack included ten
rockets.
And they missed. Good thing they are not just incompetent, but damn incompetent. MosNews (Russia) 30-May-09 Click here to see original story Council Lifts Legally
Parked Car. Paints No Parking. Tows Car. Denies Towing It For
3 Weeks. Charges $3.3K Fine For Not Paying Fine Quickly Lambeth council workers in the UK lifted Ruth Ducker's Volkswagen Golf, where it was legally parked, in a spot that had always been a legal parking spot, painted no parking lines underneath it, placed the car back down and then later came and towed it away for being illegally parked! And then it gets dumb. Ms. Ducker had no idea where her car had gone. The council denied for 3 weeks any knowledge of having had it towed. When finally realizing they had taken it, they charged her a $1,200 penalty for waiting over 3 weeks to pay the fine! The fine grew to about $3.3K before a member of Parliament intervened on her behalf and the fines were dropped. Residents were not warned about the change ahead of time. The council says it was a communication issue as in not understanding the common advice, "don't act like a bunch of schmucks." Daily Mail (UK) 28-May-09 Click here to see original story Update: May 22, 2009 @ 20:01 GMT A: 500 Ruble Note. Q:
Which Banknote, Meant To Display The Solovetsky Monastery, Instead
Displays The Solovetsky Death Camp?
"We feel pain for veterans and
for the people who died in these damned death camps," said
a 72-year-old north Russian resident, when speaking of the new 500
ruble Russian note.
The crosses, which were atop the
Solovetsky monastery, were removed when the monastery was was turned
into a death camp in 1926. The banknote picture shows the building
without the crosses.
"Our banknote is the only note in the world with a picture of a World War II concentration camp!" MosNews (Russia) 22-May-09 Click here for original story Update: May 16, 2009 @ 14:29 GMT Bone Chips Some bone chips in the
fractured
world of boneheads:
Update: May 9, 2009 @ 16:27 GMT Angry That The Packaged Pizza You Bought Has No Topping? Better Turn It Over Before Calling In A Complaint Funny complaint recording. Then it was the store's fault, of course, for not having an arrow on the box Upside down logic
Actual recording of a complaint phoned in by a man who bought a packaged pizza at a supermarket and thought it had no topping. He was holding it upside down. The store tried to turn it right, but he insists never-the-less that it was the store's fault for not having a label indicating which side of the pizza is up.
Update: May 7, 2009 @ 01:16 GMT Got $9.2M To Throw Away? How About A Painting With Nothing More Than 8 Black Lines? Only $1.15M Per Line A waste of money? Seems black and white to us Here is a picture of a painting that
just sold at Sotheby's 2009 Art Auction for
$9,266,500.
It would be fine if someone spent over $9M for something worthless if that $9M would do some good. But when it's just passed from one rich dude to another rich dude it's a sad waste. If the money was used to buy $9M of groceries or cars or something where it was put back into the economy, we wouldn't mind so much. Update: May 4, 2009 @ 23:41 GMT Big Meeting?? Slides? check! Projector? check! Turned off Screen Saver? Doh! 31 second vid. Not safe for your work either Titillating look into the mind
of a man who forgot to turn off his screen saver. Not safe for your work either.
Local UK Council Orders 6-year-old To Stop Making Pebble Dams In A 2 Inch Deep Creek, Citing Flash Flood Danger `We can't have people doing this sort of thing willy-nilly' A
6-year-old boy was ordered by a local UK council to stop building
pebble dams in a 2 inch deep creek because, they claim, the
pebbles could cause a "flash flood."
The boy's father, Rob Johnson, was left stunned. "Daniel doesn't make proper dams. It's just a few pebbles in a row that water flows around." But the Nettleham Parish Council is sticking to their story, "We can’t have people doing this sort of thing willy-nilly. We are very concerned about the potential consequences of flooding." It seems the creek is not the only thing that runs shallow in Nettleham. Sunday Express 2-May-09 Click here for original story Lazy
Florida Thief Phones Area Fast Food Restaurants
Asking
Them To Bring Him Cash. No, He's Not The Bonehead.
It's Been Working Like A Charm! Someone in Clay and Duval
Counties in Florida, has simply been calling
local McDonald's, Wendy's, Burger King and Subway restaurants and
telling employees that he either owns the store or is the District
Manager, and that they should leave money for him at various
local locations, including, one time, some mailbox somewhere.
And deliver
it they did, having no idea what-so-ever that it was a trick, if you
even want to dignify this by calling it a trick. Update: April 26, 2009 @ 16:24 GMT Bone Chips Some bone chips in the
fractured
world of boneheads:
Update: April 25, 2009 @ 15:07 GMT Man
Is Billed $62K By Cell Company To Download Wall-E. Realizing
How
Embarrassing This Is, They Reduced It
To $17K So, you purchase a data card for
your laptop that gets you access to
the cellphone network and you decide to download a movie. You
figure that whilst it will probably be pricey, it's not like
it's
going to cost hundreds of dollars. And you'd be right, of
course.
It will cost you thousands of dollars.
Sixty-two
thousand dollars, actually, if you do it from another country.
The phone company says it cost them $17K to download the movie. In all fairness to Verizon, the article doesn't mention the actual phone company, although it could very well be Verizon, because they all charge these same outrageous rates. And, yes, it isn't the cost of the movie, per se, but the cost of the time on the Internet, but still... So, let's reason this out. The reason people fall into this trap is that they assume that their phone company wouldn't be stupid enough to pay someone $17K for a movie and so something like this couldn't possibly happen to them. But not only are the phone companies dumb enough to pay $17K for a movie but they think you're dumb enough to throw in an extra $45K just for them. Back in my day, a "carrier" was someone like Typhoid Mary. Today a "carrier" is what you call a cell phone company. In either case, it still refers to parasites. ARS Technica 24-Apr-09 Click here for original story Hospital ER Staff Leaves
Collapsed Man Outside Their Door And Calls 911 Instead, Citing Patient
Safety Concerns A man in a hospital gown who
collapsed just outside the emergency room door of City Hospital in
Saskatoon, Canada, was left on the ground while ER staff phoned up 911.
"There was no
attempt on their part [City Hospital ER staff] to assess the patient's
condition,
to get a gurney or back-brace to the scene, or even to rush out and
triage the patient." I prefer to use the word
"victim" instead of "patient."
When stupid people control the hospitals The city says this is standard procedure. That the staff at the emergency room are not trained to deal with medical emergencies. They say that if the staff leave the hospital they might hurt themselves or the victim. Better the man should die or suffer unnecessary injury. The Canadian Health Minister, Don McMorris, in response, says he is going to contact Canada's 12 health regions and explain that common sense needs to be used when following procedures. Good luck with that! The Star Phoenix (Saskatoon, Canada) 22-Apr-09 Click here for original story Update: April 18, 2009 @ 14:55 GMT Bone Chips Some bone chips in the fractured
world of boneheads:
Update: April 17, 2009 @ 02:20 GMT Taking Pictures While
Visiting London? You Better Believe That's An Act Of Terrorism "There's
a reason you separate military and the police. One fights the enemies
of the state, the other serves and protects the people. When the
military becomes both, then the enemies of the state tend to become the
people." -- The Gospel of Admiral Bill Adama
Did You Survive A Mass
Shooting? Don't Forget To File A Grievance For
Missing Your Lunch Hour
14
people were left dead after a shooting spree on April
3rd in Binghamton, NY. Yet, one man, who remained inside the
Department of Social Services, safe and sound, felt that during the
shooting someone should have been concerned about his missing his lunch
hour and so he filed a formal complaint demanding that he get paid for
the missed hour. Update: April 14, 2009 @ 01:37 GMT "The Aroused Elephant Ruined My Honeymoon Because He Made Me Feel Inadequate" And Other Travel Complaints "The beach was too sandy" Now we can all enjoy the vacations that dumb people take, thanks to Thomas Cook and the Association of British Travel Agents, who keep track of the bonehead complaints they receive from returning travelers. Dumb and feeling inadequate is no way to go through life, son. For your enjoyment, tales of people's dumber vacations:
News.com.au (Australia) 13-Apr-2009 Click here for the original story Got A Pine Tree Growing In Your Lung? It's More Likely Than You Think A weird extra report 28-year-old,
Artyom Sidorkin, of central Russia, had a 2 inch (5 cm) fir
tree growing inside his lung.
Apparently the hapless Sidorkin had breathed in a seed or small bud. He sought medical help for severe pain and because he was coughing up blood. Initially doctors suspected cancer but their suspicions changed when the biopsy contained "green needles." MosNews (Moscow) 14-Apr-2009 Click here for the original story Update: April 5, 2009 @ 16:23 GMT Don't Lower The Drawbridge After 30 Seconds If Ships Need 60 Seconds To Go Under First the ship had one bridge, then two bridges, and then no bridges. 1:45 video The
large vessel, Windoc, while passing under the Allenburg bridge in
Ontario on August 11, 2001, was given 30 seconds to go under
the drawbridge. But it needs 60 seconds, at least.
Amazingly nobody was hurt, the $6M cargo was fine but the ship was a total loss. It's not just cars and trains that need to contend with bridges being down, apparently. A single use of an inappropriate word may make this not safe for work. Update: April 1, 2009 @ 20:57 GMT TV Station Needs Censor Array Adjustment After Being Fooled Into On-Air Birthday Announcements For "Anita Lay," "Willie B Hardigan" And Others Brought to you by our friends in Kirksville, Missouri KTVO in
Kirksville, Missouri, probably because there isn't enough local news to
fill a half hour, will wish anyone a "Happy Birthday" or "Happy
Anniversary," without giving it a thought. Apparently.
Some tricksters sent in some obviously fake names and got them to say things that people in Kirksville, Missouri, may not often hear on the air.. Among those recognized on this special day included:
Here is the broadcast. You may not want to play it at work. Update: April 1, 2009 @ 19:52 GMT Brought A Mobile Phone That You Found To The Police? You Better Believe That's An Immediate Arrest With Fingerprinting And DNA Swab Gives new meaning to "being in right trouble" Paul
Leicester, 18, an A-level college student, found a cell phone
and turned it over to the Merseyside Police in Southport,
UK. Oh, that's good!
No, that's bad because he was immediately arrested for "theft by finding." "The teenager was kept by Merseyside Police in Southport police station for four hours and had his fingerprints taken, along with a DNA swab and a photo for police records." He was eventually released. And what says Leicester about the incident? "I thought I was doing the right thing and had it thrown back in my face. 'I would not go to the police in future.'" That's some mighty fine police work there, Merseyside. Great job building community trust. By the way, the police chief recently won a WOW! Award for premium customer service. Here chief, another WOW! award for you, as in "Wow, what a git!" UK Daily Mail 1-Apr-08 Click here for original story Update: March 28, 2009 @ 18:44 GMT Men's Room Mugger Decides To Rob Convention Attendees, According To 300 Police Officers At The Police Convention The mugger chose a former police chief as his first (and last) victim A
Pennsylvania mugger decided to hang around a convention
center's men's room during a police convention, waiting for a victim,
with the first turning out being a former police chief. Oh.
If only there was a way to quickly find a police officer to arrest him.
Associated Press 28-Mar-08 Click here for original story Update: March 27, 2009 @ 08:38 GMT Want your students to win swim races? Do you: 1) teach better technique, 2) build up stamina, or 3) throw a live crocodile into the pool? "One girl described the experience as `absolutely terrifying'" Australian
swimming coach, Mark "watch your butt" Davies, says his secret to
getting his young swimmers to "beat the clock" is by having a hungry
crocodile chase them in the pool.  But don't worry. He has it all mathematically figured out. "Davies says he checks the croc's swimming speed first, and makes sure the swimmer has enough of a head start that the crocodile can't really catch up. " What could possibly cramp his plan? CNN 9-Oct-08 Click here for original story Update: March 22, 2009 @ 09:26 GMT Man Sues Himself, Another Man Sues Magician For Stealing God's Power, Plus 13 Other Schmucks Stories of 15 court jesters First
is Robert Lee Brock who sued himself for $5 million dollars for
violating his own religious beliefs by committing a crime.
And because he couldn't possibly pay, he said the
state would have to pay it on his behalf. It was thrown out. Next is Christopher Roller who sued both magicians, David Copperfield and David Blaine, for not getting his permission first (he's God, you see) before performing certain magic acts which he said required his Godly powers to achieve. In the article you can read about a man who sued Michael Jordan for looking like him (we gave a Bonehead Award for this a while back), a town in Turkey, named "Batman," which sued Warner Brothers for using their name without permission in Batman movies, of course, and so many more. Paralegal 19-Mar-09 Click here for original story Update: March 18, 2009 @ 09:53 GMT Resist The Urge To Burgle The Neighborhood While Wearing An Ankle Monitor Recording Every Detail Of Your Whereabouts "We were able to ... pinpoint right down to the rooftops" A
Florida teen, free pending his trial for burglary under
conditions that he wear a police location monitor, decided to burgle
the neighborhood, according to the police computer which said, "and
then he went to this house, and then this house, ..." ABC Action News 13-Mar-09 (Tampa, Florida) Click here for original story Don't Complete Something Called The "Dartmoor Devil Endurance Event" If Claiming You Were Too Ill To Answer Your Bosses Phone Calls For 92 Days Saying attempts to reach you was a "campaign of bullying" will not get your job back either A
UK IT worker, Andrew Hamlyn, 54, who claimed his severe lung
infection made him too sick to answer his bosses phone calls and emails
for 92 days, and who was photographed completing the 66 mile
bike
challenge called the "Dartmoor Devil Endurance Event," 21 days into his
"illness", claimed unfair dismissal in court.
He claimed,
The Daily Mail (UK) 6-Mar-09 Click here for the original story Update: March 3, 2009 @ 20:47 GMT British Giant, Tesco, Refuses Alcohol Sales To Parents The fun never begins until stupid people do law enforcement British
super giant retailer, Tesco, is committed to
trying to stop adults from buying alcohol for minors. So ...
Tesco refused to sell 2 bottles of wine to Karen Dumelow, 46, because she might give them to her 14-year-old daughter who accompanied her shopping. Dumelow appealed the cashier's refusal to 3 senior staff members at the Portsmouth store, but they all agreed it was too risky to sell her the wine. But wait! There's more! When she left the store and immediately returned without her daughter, what do you think? Yep, no problem selling her the wine! "I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It was crazy. Do you have to leave your children at home if you want to buy alcohol now?" said Ms. Dumelow. "The part that incensed me the most was that literally one minute later I bought the wine from the same till - it was unbelievable." After she sent a letter of complaint, Tesco sent her an apology for hiring stupid people. "We work hard to prevent under-age sales, including proxy sales where adults purchase alcohol for under-18s. However in this instance we got it wrong and sincerely apologise.'" The Mail (UK) 03-Mar-09 Click here for the original story Update: March 1, 2009 @ 19:05 GMT Try Remembering To Print On Both Sides Of Your Fake Money When Buying Drugs From An Undercover Officer It did buy extra jail time though A
21-year-old Erwin, Tennessee, man, whose wit is a half dollar shy of a
full dollar, was arrested on drug and money counterfeiting charges
after he tried buying OxyContin from an undercover police officer using
money he printed himself. Much of his fake money was only
printed on one side.
Dude, you are doing it all wrong! MSNBC 28-Feb-09 Click here for the original story Thank you Kathy Perry !! Irish Police Could Not Figure Out How A Man With 50 Traffic Violations And 50 Different Addresses Was Never Caught The answer was under their noses all the time Irish
police have been trying, in vain, to catch a Polish man who had
seemingly racked up 50 traffic violations, providing 50 different
addresses, and who somehow managed to escape capture at every traffic
stop. But the mystery has been solved.
Have a look at this Polish driving license. If you were an Irish police officer, what name would you be inclined to write down?  If you said "Prawo Jazdy," then go stand over there with the Irish police. Prawo Jazdy is indeed the man they have been looking for. But "Prawo Jazdy" in Polish means, "Driving License." The European Union should standardize the driving licenses of its member countries. Australian Broadcasting Corp 20-Feb-09 Click here for the original story Update: February 28, 2009 @ 03:16 GMT Alabama Ordered To Pay $177K Back Pay To A Woman For A Non-Existent Job A "Justice is blind, but only because it has its head up its butt," bonehead award Montgomery,
Alabama, County Circuit Court Judge Truman Hobbs Jr. has ordered
Alabama to pay former state legislator Sue Schmitz $177K in back pay
for being "improperly
fired" just days after she was convicted in Federal court of several
felonies including receiving pay for the non-existent
job.
"We're going to do everything we know to do to keep from paying Sue Schmitz one more dollar," said Bradley Byrne, chancellor of the state's two-year college system. "We have more uses for $177,000 than giving it to someone who did nothing to earn it." Schmitz was found guilty Tuesday of three counts of mail fraud and four other counts, one being the collecting of pay for the non-existent job. Gives new meaning to the term, "criminal justice." The Birmingham News (Alabama) 27-Feb-09 Click here for the original story Don't Answer Your Cell And Start Explaining What Went Wrong In Your Prior Operation While Your Next Eye Surgery Patient Is Awake On The Table Patient bolted from the table and didn't return. Doctor to get HMO award. A
patient ran from the operating theater when his eye surgeon answered a
cell phone call and began explaining what went wrong in the prior
operation. The patient, who was awake and lying on the
table at the time, didn't like what he was hearing and he ran from the
theater.
Having a "Doctor on call" did not, this time, comfort the patient. Northern Territory News (Australia) 20-Feb-09 Click here for the original story Update: February 16, 2009 @ 00:43 GMT "Doing Your Business" In A Police Station Men's Room Stall Never Refers To Your Phone-Based Drug Business Man's drug business is in the toilet ... again. A 24-year-old man was arrested
by the Everett, Washington, police when
several officers overhead him making drug deals on his cell phone
whilst sitting in one of the men's room stalls. LOOs lips got him in trouble. The Herald (Everett, Washington) 29-Jan-09 Click here for the original story Send A Check Written On An Unwashed Kitchen Table? That's A Full Hazmat Alert With Quarantined Police And Evacuation I'm
not pudding you on!
A
Colorado Springs, Colorado, man who simply describes himself
as "not a clean person," caused a full hazmat alert, which
included the quarantining of two police officers, when he paid his $35
parking ticket with a check he wrote out on his "messy kitchen table."
Apparently some Jello-brand instant vanilla pudding powder
came along for the ride.
The proof of the pudding The alert continued until special infrared sensor equipment could be called in which then identified the unknown powder as pudding powder. ABC, Channel 7 News (Denver, Colorado) 13-Feb-09 Click here to read the original story Update: February 12, 2009 @ 01:37 GMT Slow Witted + Fast Train = Lost Sole He could have lost his soul, but fate settled for his sole instead. 16 second video you'll watch at least twice 
Update:
February 05, 2009
@ 21:58 GMT
Ooh. Empty Parking Space. Better Make A Jump For It World's worst parking job. Notice how close the back of the car is to the edge. 1:19 long video Daily Cartoon
from CartoonStock.com
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